Are you feeling unsupported or betrayed?
I've been back 2 weeks now from my trip to SA and still
I find myself running.
Yes, I know. I've left you dangling far too long about what
they actually mean.
In fact, I've left this issue dangling so long you could be
in danger of growing this marker on your hand as a result!
(And so could I!)
Let's see if we can start to rub these blighters out with
the help of this newsletter.
First a bit about my trip.
My fears about spending our 'summer holiday' in South
Africa's mid-winter were unfounded. The weather was
sublime, warmer than here! The bushveld was looking
magnificent with aloes all aflame, no mosquitoes and, we
wore Tshirts! It was great to catch up with family and
friends especially for Jules to get to know his grand
My courses and consultations went well too. There are now
14 people in SA who can decode fingerprints. If you are one
of these 14, congratulations! I hope you are practising on
family and friends. Thanks also to all who allowed me the
privilege of looking into their hands while I was over
Back to dangling X's.
Dangling X's look just like they sound. Like little or big
X's dangling just below your heartline.
What do they indicate?
X's that hang like dirty laundry on a wash line are to do
with feeling unsupported.
By whom? In what way?
Well that depends on exactly where they show up.
Let's look at 2 common places:
1. If they dangle under your heartline below your Apollo
(ring) finger this means you feel unsupported by your
2. If they dangle under the 'point of intimacy', (that is,
the point on your heartline directly between your ring
finger and pinkie) this has to do with feeling unsupported
by your spouse or intimate partner. When this X is very
large it means the feeling is more extreme. Betrayal might
be a better word!
But this is just the first take.
It's easy to say, 'My husband betrayed me when he ran off
with another woman.' but if we look beyond the pain, behind
the veil, is that really true?
It takes a huge amount of personal honesty to recognise
ourselves in the mirror. The only person who can really
betray us is ourselves. We betray ourselves when we don't
honour our own truth. When we don't listen to our inner
guidance. When we give up on our dreams or don't support
ourselves in numerous small or big ways.
Usually it takes quite a bit of not supporting oneself
before one's partner is ready to collaborate and mirror for
you the shadow side of self betrayal. Ask me! (been there,
done that, bought the t-shirt.!)
If you are feeling unsupported by your intimate partner ask
yourself: in what way am I not supporting myself?
And, what about friends?
Let's examine this feeling of not being supported by
friends a bit deeper.
I find this one even more difficult to own up to.
Have you ever heard this wisecrack:
'I can keep a secret. It's the people I tell it to who
Well, that's what these particular X's are mostly about at
a deeper level.
Sometimes takes years of therapy to see that the betrayal
we accuse others of is actually in our own hearts.
When this happened to me once it knocked the wind right out
of my sails.
I always thought of myself as loyal and honest but I broke
a friend's confidence by passing on delicate (okay let's
get real here. Make that juicy and highly damaging!!)
information to my husband about a third person (his new
I thought as "the wounded one" I was justified in
'enlightening' him. But in the process I betrayed a dear
friend. It turned out she was the only person on the planet
who knew that particular snippet of information and I'd let
her down real bad by breaking her confidence and passing the
It's not a question of whether you can trust the next
person with the information.
The question is, can you keep a confidence? Can you refrain
from passing on gossip?
I once came across a list of quotes by famous people
compiled by a leading personal growth expert.(I forget
which one). About halfway down was this:
'If you can't say something nice about someone, don't say
anything.' by....... your mother!
I thought this was very funny because that is exactly what
my mom used to say.
Probably yours too!!
So how can we support ourselves?
By listening to inner guidance. By showing up for
ourselves. By setting limits. By staying congruent. By not
putting our life purpose in ice. By putting our own joy and
In my next blog we'll look at these and other ways we can support
ourselves in more detail.
In the meantime, if you need any support, just look at your
Your strengths and talents are all there.
PS: If you haven't had a hand analysis consultation yet,
please go to
There's no better way to show yourself some genuine